ACTIVE VOICE AVOIDING PASSIVE CONSTRUCTION1 (57) VERBS DO SOMETHING

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 Active Voice: Avoiding Passive Construction

Active Voice: Avoiding Passive Construction^¹ (57)

Verbs do something.

Verbs move sentences, describe actions, and energize language.

^²Forceful verbs make sentences emphatic. (Harbrace 11d, 1). The Active voice emphasizes the doer of the action. The passive voice emphasizes the action, not the actor and often results in wordier sentences.
Example: In the poems written by Sylvia Plath, death is discussed. (passive)

Revised: Sylvia Plath discusses death in her poems. (active)

Note how the active voice answers the question “who is doing the action (Sylvia Plath)?” and then answers the question “what is the action (discusses)?”

When analyzing or discussing literature, writers should use the active voice in order to keep the reader’s interest and to present their ideas clearly, vividly, and energetically.

Use Action verbs instead of “to be” or “have” verbs to avoid empty, wordy, lifeless sentences (Harbrace 11d, 2).

“To be or not to be ?. . .”

Example: The themes that are being established by Plath are morbid and are filled with images of death.

Revised: Plath’s themes establish morbid and death-like images.

Note how the actor assumes the first place in the sentences. When you write, put the actor first and then follow with an action verb (like “establish”). Note how we use the simple present tense instead of the present progressive.

Example: In this passage, Plath is expressing death in the image of a gray cloud.

Revised: In this passage, Plath expresses death in the image of a gray cloud.

(We often use the present progressive because we use it in spoken conversation. Effective writers note the difference between written and spoken English and therefore usually use the simple present).

The have’s and have not’s

Example: Plath’s work often has a tone of depression.

Revised: Plath’s work expresses a tone of depression.

Note how we substitute the “have” verb with an active verb and how this energizes the sentence.

Applying these rules to your own writing: Find at least 3 passively constructed sentences and/or “to be” or “have” constructions and revise them on the back of this sheet.

You may keep this sheet with your own examples as a guide for your own writing.

1 Adapted from the Harbrace College Handbook 13^th ed. Created for the University Writing Center by

Ruth A. Dunkerley and Andy “Sunfrog” Smith.

2 Refer to “Active Verbs for Critical Essays” handout (exercise 57b)

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